Friday, December 12, 2008

Exchanging Pleasantaries

I remember a time when I would be perfectly happy chasing a fire truck that would fit in the confines of my then tiny little hands.. It would amaze me, the chase that is... and upon catching up to the object of my then interest... I found that I felt a sense of calm and contentment. Today I could watch a firetruck (that is the one's that are way bigger than I am and the one's that would certainly not fit in the confines of my now relatively bigger hands) explode and it would still not shock me silly. I'd get a grip on the situation , analyze it , come to various conclusions as to why the explosion might have taken place etc and in the end get bored of further probing and probably leave.Strange transition this growing up. How perfectly unexciting. Why I wonder doesn't a cotton candy not mesmerize me the way it used to... Why I wonder does the thought of climbing a jungle gym not thrill me anymore..why I wonder don't I see fish in my bathtub anymore when there was a time I was certain that I could see sharks. I wonder now why I spend some of my time hoping for love, when there was a time I felt it envelope me from all around. My cravings are still of the same intensity, but perhaps now I disappoint easily.Small talk back then was non-existent and utterly unnecessary because I didn't bother with people who didn't interest me or capture my imagination or entice me with a toffee, but today I find I need it in my arsenal to keep face. I mingle with faces I'd rather not see, what benefits from this I shall avail u ask? ..In reply I'd shrug my shoulders and say 'hey u got me!' . Truth be told I miss the good old days, I wish I wouldn't have to use the term 'the good old days'.. for it only proves that may be this time or era just simply doesn't measure up to the one that succumbed to change which is perhaps the only constant and the continuity that is life.Where I wonder did I drop my ability to be intrigued and why I wonder did I not bother to look for it.May be I've saturated, May be I've accepted certain truths, May be I've been let down too often, May be I grew up.

I've probably forgotten how to live...

or may be I just miss the excitement ..............

2 comments:

Riddance and Digression said...

maybe its because we grow wiser to feel we are bound to society by society. and we allow.

Kiya said...

Aah...u grew up for sure... and its not the most fun part of life...